CalvinDude.com

Everyone over at the Debunking Atheism website seems to have an interresting deconversion story, so I’m going to give you my deconversion story.

It began when I was two.  When I turned two, something happened: Mt. St. Helens erupted.  I decided that God couldn’t exist if a mountain spewed forth ash like a dragon. Dragons didn’t exist, so God couldn’t exist either. 

This was only further proven by the time I was seven when I asked my Dad, “If God is eternal then doesn’t that mean He had to wait forever before He could create us?”  Obviously, it was bunk to believe in God since forever would take forever to get here.  It’s much more logical to believe the universe has been around forever than it is to believe in a God that could be around forever.  I mean, inert matter has patience to wait forever before spontaneously evolving us; God is impatient and wouldn’t have waited that long.

By the time I turned thirteen, I realized that God was patterned after my father.  Thus, He was stupid.  He wouldn’t let me drink beer and trampled my rights, just like the Old Testament.  I realized that if God was really a parent, He would have made me faster than every other kid on the playground so that I could become a superstar and have unprotected sexual relations with every girl on the cheerleading squad.  Since I didn’t get what I wanted, God obviously didn’t exist.

Of course, my Christian friends told me that He DID exist.  They said, “If God made everyone faster than everyone else that would be a contradiction!” but they said God could do anything, so they’re the stupid ones.  Then they said that what I wanted was actually “immoral.”  I decided that it wasn’t immoral therefore it wasn’t actually immoral.  I furthermore decided that it was really God who was immoral, and therefore He didn’t exist.  Nevermind the fact that I think Christians are immoral too but I don’t doubt that they exist; for some reason this argument still applies to God because otherwise it wouldn’t be an argument.

Then I turned eighteen and realized that God was really just another form of Government.  God was invented to keep the masses stupid.  I wasn’t stupid, therefore God didn’t exist.  People in power forced everyone else to believe in a magical fake miracle man up in the sky when it was really George W. Bush’s satellites up there spying on you.  Religion was just a tool of oppression used by the Government to keep the sheep in line.  Nevermind the fact that I can’t explain how it is possible that everyone else on Earth would be so stupid that the Government could make up a fictional God from whole cloth and magically make them believe in this mythical being when the Government can’t even make us believe anything politicians say.  I just take it for granted that I am the only one enlightened–it makes arguing much easier that way.

After college, I realized everything I thought I knew about God must be what God really was like.  I would talk to Christians and they would tell me that the God I was destroying in my arguments wasn’t the real God–but c’mon, they’re already deluded into BELIEVING He exists so why would you expect them to define Him correctly instead of me?  If you believed in unicorns, would that make you an expert in defining unicorns?  I think not.  It would make you an expert canidate for the room with all the padded walls.

All of the above is pretty compelling evidence as to why God does not exist.  It’s compelling evidence because I say it is.  Therefore it is.  Therefore, God does not exist.

Anyone who thinks that Christianity and Islam are equal religions needs to get a clue.  Here we see:

“Rejecting Islam is insulting God. We will not allow God to be humiliated. This man must die,” said cleric Abdul Raoulf, who is considered a moderate and was jailed three times for opposing the Taliban before the hardline regime was ousted in 2001.

 

That’s right, the moderate position is that if you were a Muslim and you become a non-Muslim, you must die.  (I think the folks over at Debunking Atheism should consider what would have happened if they were ex-Muslims instead of ex-Christians.)

If this doesn’t highlight the difference between the two religions, it’s only because you are refusing to see.  Most people probably can’t even remember the last time a Christian blew up an abortion clinic–and even if they did have memories that went back that long, they’d have to acknowledge that the overwhelming Christian response from everyone including the “Religious Right” was condemnation of the whackos who did such things.

Islam, on the other hand, continues to blow up people daily.

Atheists like to say that all religions are equal, and that religion is the heart of all the problems in the world.  This is patently absurd, and it’s fairly easy to prove:

Would you rather offend a Christian (which the Debunkers do constantly) or a Muslim?

Tell me again how these are equal?